Letting Go of Inhibitions “Don’t make that face or it’ll freeze that way!” – everyone’s mom Yeah, well, most moms used to say that, but I’m a mom and I don’t believe I’ve ever helped pass that story on to the next generation of gullible kids. Besides, I’ve found that making faces can make oneself some pretty decent money. Recently, I was delighted to be booked for a job that required both voice over and on-camera work. I love VO and film/TV work equally – they’re my “twins” and, like any good mom, I don’t play favorites. It was great fun to first create my character with just my voice, and then react with some pretty expressive faces for the close-up photography that will accompany the audio. My character was a rather moody individual, vascillating from bossy and stubborn to maternal (with a rather saccharine edge) to cruel and intolerant. Throw in some manipulative behavior and the desire to coddle an adult child, and you can correctly presume that she was fun to play. While I have my moments as a real mom, the character I played was a bit of a departure from my everyday self. But that’s why it’s called acting. It’s about letting go of your personal ego to inhabit a different character and peer out at the world through her eyes. You need to develop a good sense of the character, her background and hopes and desires, disappointments, and all that made her who she is, right on up to the moment that the scene takes place. If the script doesn’t tell you outright or reveal it during the course of the story, then it’s up to the actor to create the history, psychological makeup, foibles and fumbles, and incorporate it into the character. And be ready to change it once you’re on set, should the director (or writer) make some adjustments on the spot. Sometimes, I wonder if kids and older people have an easier time creating these character stories and inhabiting their imagined personas. On both ends of the age spectrum, I’ve noticed that there’s more of a willingness to play and less worry about appearances. I’ve seen this especially among women who are moving into and through the second half of their lives. Personally, I feel like I’m truly at more ease with myself, accepting who I am as a person, acknowledging both my strengths and limitations. There’s less concern about looking a certain way or fitting in with your peer group. You’re more comfortable expressing yourself as an individual, and you certainly don’t worry as much about what people think as you have before. Most of all, after years of hard work in a career or building a family, there’s a desire to have more fun, and to more fully experience life and all its choices. Maybe that’s because you’re also aware that the years ahead are more finite than you’d like to believe. Always a scary thought. Followed by the realization that for some number of those years, you may not have the physical or mental ability to live life as fully as you can right now . Perhaps because of all that, it’s easier to channel your inner child more freely and to just let go of your inhibitions. Maybe it’s nature’s way of preparing you to eventually enter your “second childhood” (another scary thought!). But I think it’s just the willingness to play again. And creating and inhabiting a character on stage, on TV, or on film is great fun. That inner child of mine gets a big kick out of making faces to express a silly point. A poignant look is worth a hundred lines of dialogue. And the right expression can tell a life story in a brief moment. I recall a business client telling me many years ago that he could always spot an employee of a certain big name corporation that had a very conservative, button-down reputation. Something about walking around like they had a stick up their nether region. I had to stifle a laugh, because I had previously been with that company, but it wouldn’t have helped me to tell him that. And there was some truth to what he said. What’s more interesting is that I’ve run into some of my former colleagues from time to time, and it seems that they’ve almost all mellowed considerably. A few have completely departed from their starched-shirt persona and seem like totally different people, working in artistic fields and looking nothing like their younger selves. They’ve relaxed into themselves, just as I have, and we’re all looking for different ways to play and live our lives. It just goes to show you that people do change over time, hopefully for the better, and sometimes in unpredictable ways. We’re not static and if we give ourselves permission, we can discover different aspects of ourselves and reveal them in play. “You can’t judge a book by its cover.” – yup, everyone’s mom again The moral of the story: listen to your mother. Once in a while, she’ll actually pass on advice that still holds true today.

Psst. Wanna buy some chocolate? And other effective sales strategies Quick! What’s the first thing you think of when you hear the word “sales?” Maybe it’s a generational thing, but growing up, images of sleazy used car salesmen used to immediately spring to mind. Snake oil salesmen promising miracle cures. Relentless telemarketers interrupting at dinner time. Ugh. That’s why I shied away from a sales career. I could never see myself as a pushy, obnoxious sales person. Or the type that oozes false friendliness to entice gullible people to make poor investment decisions that benefits no one but myself. Yup, I watched a lot of TV, saw too many movies featuring that stereotype. No thanks! On a practical level, I couldn’t see myself working on 100% commissions either. No wonder the underhanded salesmen on the big and small screens tried every trick they knew to separate people from their money. Clearly, they were desperate. Again, something I didn’t want to be, if I could at all avoid it. Who wants to live their life like that?! That’s how I thought about sales. Ewwww. About as attractive as a worm wriggling and writhing on the sidewalk after a heavy rain. Slowly dying. Or about to get stepped on. Imagine, then, when actual experience dispelled the stereotypes. I'm not saying there aren't those who fit the sleaze bag mold (we've all come across one or two), but they’re outweighed by many more nice, honest, hardworking individuals. I actually became one of them. The good guys, that is. It all started innocently and innocuously at first. Did you ever trick-or-treat for UNICEF as a kid? Like millions of elementary school kids, I did. It was expected of us every Halloween. We were trained to be pint-sized sales people and collect change to help alleviate children’s suffering around the world. A noble cause, but allegations of financial mismanagement by UNICEF and its beneficiaries has pretty much ended the trick-or-treat program. Or you can accept the company line, aptly put by Evelyne Guindon, executive director for UNICEF Quebec in 2006 when they ended the program, “ the annual loose change collection isn't worth the money that's amassed.” Did you ever sell wrapping paper or magazine subscriptions for school-sponsored fundraisers? I see you raising your hand. Yup, in junior high, I was one of the many students encouraged to raise money for needy, deserving kids by selling magazine subscriptions during the holidays. And to entice us, the more we sold, the better the prizes we could win. I was in it to win! I remember trudging door to door in the cold and the snow, asking neighbors if they wanted a magazine subscription. Or if they’d like to get ahead of their renewals for the low, low (well, really not so low) price I was offering. Bummer. I was turned down every single time, though I did occasionally collect a Christmas cookie from a neighbor who felt sorry for me. My parents usually bought the one subscription to TV Guide that saved me from looking like a total sales loser when the school tallied the contributions. I think I won a pencil for my efforts. It got better in high school. I actually had a pretty good time selling giant Hershey bars for $1 each during chorus practice. For a charitable fundraising drive, of course. So many kids, the teacher who was working with one group or another didn’t notice the passing of chocolate and dollar bills up and down the rows. For a few weeks anyways. Soon after, the school issued a ban on anyone selling anything for any reason on school grounds. I had to take my operation outside, which didn’t work so well, as I lost the opportunity to wave chocolate under the noses of bored, confined teens. I also put on a few pounds when I couldn’t make my sales goals any other way and just bought the remaining bars for myself. Then there was the summer I went over to the dark side. After my junior year of high school, I took a job as one of those dreaded telemarketers calling at dinner time and during the early evening, selling coupon books for discounts on local attractions and restaurants. I was better at it than I had thought I could be and my conscience started pinging. I worried that I was preying on little old ladies with nary a dollar to their names, who were just so lonely and desperate to talk to anyone that they’d give up money for food and medicine to keep me on the line. Never mind that we were just moving down pages of the citywide phone book. I felt like I could be a horrible human being. Yet I stayed, because other types of summer jobs had all been long filled. Furthermore, I was exceeding my numbers and felt good about it, since I saw many other young people regularly being fired for not making their quotas. Soon enough, I found myself promoted to a “special” room for their top telemarketers. The company kept us happy with goodies that none of the other telemarketers knew about: pizzas, cookies, brownies, and soft drinks. All to entice us to stay and make money for them. So I stayed. Why not? The pay was decent, for a high school kid anyways, and the extras were fun. Not to mention that I had lots of laughs with the other girls in our special room. (For some reason, very few boys ever made it to this “executive” level.) We’d call up people and introduce ourselves with made-up names, some exotic-sounding and others just plain silly. We were “Bambi” and “Tawny” and who knows what else. It was a game to see who could convincingly present herself as something other than a know-nothing high school or college kid and still make a sale. We were golden as long as we produced. And we did produce, until the company determined that they had saturated the local market and abruptly closed up shop and disappeared. And I mean disappeared. Wham! Drove to their offices one day and they were gone without a trace. Pizzas and cookies? Gone. Fortunately, the few extra pounds that they produced eventually disappeared, too. Yeah, I felt a little guilty about selling their entertainment discount books. True, it was legitimate and I even bought a book myself for discounts at shops and restaurants around town. But enough to justify the cost? Eh, not really. I certainly hoped that my elderly customers used more than enough of those coupons to make up for the cost of the book. The whole experience left me feeling that I might have been a little too good at selling something questionably useful to lonely, neglected elders who just needed a human being to talk to. After that experience, I stayed away from studying sales and marketing in college, though I might have found the courses interesting. I couldn’t shake the impressions of sleazy salesmen or unscrupulous business practices from my mind. So later in my working life, when I had the opportunity to move into technology sales, I was more than a little surprised to learn that there is such a thing as consultative sales: listening to the customer to understand their business problem, seeing if and how my company’s products and services could help them, and then proposing tailored solutions for a winning outcome for us both. It was a sweet spot. It appealed to my heart and mind as an interesting, challenging, and totally “above board” way of doing business. And no lonely, desperate little old ladies were financially harmed in the process. The image of the sleazy salesman was relegated to the old movie or TV show, where he belonged. Now, well into my adult years, I’m at peace with sales, though I still shy away from “dialing for dollars” when I’m helping with charitable fundraising drives. Trading products and services for dollars is fine, calling people up asking for donations is out of my comfort zone. I still think of myself as a consultative sales specialist when I’m marketing my voice over services. Every “sale” is a “win-win” situation for both the customer and myself, though I like to give a “value add” (to use a term from my long-ago IBM training) to every professionally-produced voice over that I send them. That’s usually on the order of multiple recordings to choose from, very fast delivery of their audio files, and highly responsive customer service. I’m happy when my customer is happy. Fair, honest exchanges of goods, services, time, and effort. That’s really what sales is about and if it’s done professionally and with the best intentions, it’s an honorable vocation. And one that can leave you feeling great about yourself and your work, and appreciative of your customers. No sleaze. No extra pounds. No self-doubts. Ah! A clean conscience and a good night’s sleep instead.

Transforming with Confidence As a kid, I loved playing Monopoly. I especially loved being the banker, a role I commandeered more often than not. Maybe it had to do with being the oldest of three siblings. Or being a little bossy. Either way, no one was surprised when I chose to study business in college and major in finance. It made sense. All through public school, I was the one who handled the money and managed the books for social organizations, theatrical productions, and fundraising efforts. I also took a lot of pride in saving the money I earned babysitting, watching the numbers grow in my savings account. Earmarked for college, of course. Let me say straight out that babysitting back then was NOT as lucrative as it is today for my daughter. I started at 50 cents an hour, and topped out at $1.50 an hour for New Year’s. Usually that included watching three kids AND a big dog, feeding everyone, cleaning up, bathing the kids, and putting them to bed. Babysitting pay was well below the minimum wage. Fast forward to today. My daughter says that some families are more than happy to shell out $20 an hour for her to watch one sleeping baby while she does her homework. Way above minimum wage, not to mention an easy-peasy job. Sheesh. I was born too early, methinks. So, yes, business was a natural field for me. My parents agreed, with my dad pushing studies in computer science as a possible career choice. Actually, they were more than a little relieved, as my first choice since early childhood was to be an actress. And it was fun teasing them throughout my school years that this indeed was what I was going to do. I loved acting – hey, I performed in plays throughout school and my early adult years, and I’m pursuing it now full-time – but back then, I knew I really wanted to start off with a business career. The Monopoly banker in me wanted to make sure that I could actually make an independent living right from the start. Having a corporate ladder to climb suited me pretty well, too. I studied quite a bit of computer science, but my sweet spot – and where I made my career - was where IT intersected business, solving both everyday and long-term strategic problems. The really techie, hands-on stuff wasn’t for me. I figured that out pretty fast when I took a class in Assembler, a computer language that a techie friend later described me as akin to programming on bare metal. Feeding a stack of punched cards to the computer at 2 am in the basement of the engineering building just didn’t cut it. Especially when I had to run the stack again and again because a single, teeny-tiny typo would kick out the entire job after 20 minutes of processing and I’d have to start all over again. Aarggh. If I had to be up and about in the middle of the night, hanging out in the computer lab was not where I wanted to be. These courses, however, set me apart from most business students and launched me into a pretty good career in IT. And I found myself transforming from student to employee, finance major to, well…. The Monopoly banker turned cyborg. Finance meshed with computer science and applied statistics and, before I knew it, I was churning out solutions to financial and engineering problems with computer assistance. A few years later, deciding I needed more human interaction and less time sitting at a desk, the cyborg morphed into a technical sales and marketing rep. “Power suit” included. (Translation: a killer marketing suit, usually a tailored red jacket with some shoulder padding, accompanying a narrow and preferably short skirt. “Power” was a thing at the time. Power software, power marketing, power this, power that. It was as ubiquitous a business word as “solution,” as in “we have a solution to every problem under the sun.”) The biggest transformation in corporate and personal identity was still to come. Years (and a wedding dress) later, I morphed into a mommy. Suddenly, after one look at baby, I found myself compelled to reverse course from the corporate climbing Type A exec and become a stay-at-home mom. Something I never thought I’d choose to do. In my field and at that time, there was no part-time work option. It’s funny how you discover things about yourself as you move through life. Priorities shift, your focus changes. When I became a mom, I came squarely face to face with the realization that I wanted – no needed - to be with my growing family and not miss my kids’ childhood milestones by being off on some business trip. As those priorities changed, skill sets were reshuffled and used in different ways. Sure, I added all sorts of new skills: cleaning up baby after some truly impressive diaper blowouts (up the back, down the legs – how do they DO that??!). Managing five things at once on two hours of sleep. Impersonating Elsie the Cow when I was hooked up to that breast pump. (Sorry, guys. TMI.) My inner business woman kept everything in order and enjoyed being efficient with her time, like paying the bills while nursing. And, of course, those diapers were really very nicely stacked. And talents that had been playing only small supporting roles in my business career started to emerge front and center. I’m talking creativity, like the kind enjoyed as a child. For me, before and during my Monopoly years, that was performing, writing, music, and art work. I’d always been creative, though it ended up taking a back seat to practicality. But those dedicated mommy years leaned on those creative skills to teach, entertain, and guide my kids as they discovered their own talents and special interests. And they paved the way for morphing from mommy to artist and entrepreneur; my transformation into an actress and voiceover talent. Ever feel like you’ve come full circle in life? I do, from creative little kid to ambitious corporate gal, and now to performing artist. Every change incorporated what came before, though different facets of my personality came to the forefront as my primary role in life changed. Skills and talents that I leaned on heavily before are now just applied in different measures and in different ways. Now, instead of using my creative inclinations to support a business career, it’s flipped. All that business know-how supports my acting and VO work. I bring in my sales and sometimes techie persona when I narrate corporate and training videos. They come out to play in TV, film, commercials, and industrials when I’m cast in strong, take-charge roles, like business and medical professionals, attorneys, and tough, protective mama bears. And those dedicated mommy years provide the flipside: caring, nurturing, and emotionally-driven characters for both VO and on-camera work. We assume different roles as we move through life, but they just build on one another, creating layers that form a more and more interesting person. (At least we hope so!) They never go away. They just morph from one thing to another and occasionally merge to become something new. I’ll always be the mom. The businesswoman. Even the pint-sized Monopoly banker. Yup, she’s still right here, actively keeping an eye on things. I’m the money manager in my household and the keeper of the family ATM. At least as far as my husband is concerned, who likes to call it “getting his allowance.” He may think I’m just catering to him and his need for easily available cash. But, according to my 10 year old self, it’s the Monopoly banker who’s really calling the shots. Just don’t tell him that. He doesn’t read my blogs. 

It’s a People-Oriented Industry Mix and match. Here’s one of my favorite things about being cast in a new project: discovering friends or long-time acquaintances who’ll be working with me. On camera or behind the scenes – I love seeing familiar faces and recounting all the other productions we’ve worked on together. Don’t get me wrong. I thoroughly enjoy meeting new people and laying the foundation for new friendships. I’ve met people from all walks of life and, in talking with them, have found more things we have in common than either of us would have believed possible. Sometimes the coincidences are downright spooky. Most recently, while we were on a little break from shooting a commercial together, another woman and I were talking about our kids. Turns out our oldest children are the same age. And I mean the same age . Same month, same day. Born just a few hours apart. Who’d a thunk it?! What’s the children’s song? Make new friends, but keep the old. One is silver and the other’s gold. (I remember that from my kids’ preschool TV-watching years!) I love showing up on set, or scanning the call sheet the night before, to see which names and faces I recognize. You just never know who production has mixed together. And it often seems like a bit of a mix and match. Who looks like they can play someone’s parent or child? Who looks like half of a long-married couple? Sometimes, casting is trying to find a match for an actor who’s already been booked. Other times, they’re looking for two people who just seem like they go together. More than once, I’ve found myself paired with the same individual over and over again. This is especially true when I’m playing part of a couple, especially if casting is leaning into a certain ethnicity. (I confess to having a mischievous moment now and then, ribbing my real-life husband about it!) Honestly, I always get a little kick out of meeting my on-set “hubby of the day.” It’s fascinating to discover how people see you, especially when you’re paired as a couple. It varies depending on your role and the type of production. What’s your characters’ histories and why are you in this particular story? Are you working class? Or are you both enjoying an upscale retirement? What’s your background, are you urban or rural residents, happily married or on the brink of divorce, victims of a crime or perhaps the masterminds of a shady operation? Pairing people who look like a matched set tells the audience one thing. Pairing two people who clearly aren’t can raise an eyebrow … and interest in the story. Regardless, it’s always a treat to see friends on set and reacquaint with those whom I’ve worked with before. Last week, during a very long day filming a commercial with a lot of down time, I had the pleasure of hanging out with another actress from my same agency. So much to talk about and catch up on, it helped idle time fly by. I had brought my computer to set, anticipating I’d have the opportunity to catch up on my work, but once we saw each other, well, not much work ended being done. And that was just fine. It made my heart so much happier to spend that time with a friend. When I’m with several people and we all know one another, there’s usually a brief accounting of, “what did we work on together?” It’s interesting to learn about their other projects and who worked with who, particularly those for which I’d also auditioned but hadn’t been cast. It’s an insight into which way casting had leaned (and perhaps why) and how the project had turned out. Sometimes, the end result is quite different from the audition sides any of us had originally seen, which could explain those casting choices. When I see old friends, classmates, or others in my agency, our time on set together is a chance to share experiences, as well as to recommend certain good acting classes, coaches, or production teams we’ve enjoyed working with. Many actors create their own original material, so it’s also an opportunity to catch up on each other’s skill sets and see if there’s a possibility of collaboration. None of this is to say that actors just hang around kibbitzing all day instead of working. Far from it! Most of these conversations are in bits and pieces throughout a long shoot schedule, during the lunch break, and only if any free time isn’t spent reviewing and rehearsing lines or blocking, assimilating script changes and dialogue, or being touched up in hair and makeup. Like anything in life, a friendly familiar face can just make your day that much brighter.

Generational Markers & What They All Mean We have attack owls in our neighborhood. Big, old MEAN owls who aren’t shy about letting you know that you’re trespassing on their turf. These attacks seem to come in the early morning hours or in the early evening, when the light is a bit diffused. Joggers have especially been their victims. Owls have been reported striking people on the back of the head, occasionally raking their hair with their talons, and more often than not, making off with a hat or two. It’s gotten to the point where joggers are considering wearing bicycle helmets, uncomfortable as those may be. It could be that poor light is reflecting off headphones, airpods, or even a bright hair tie that the birds mistake for prey. That’s being generous. A number of people have deduced that most attacks seems to be coming from one particularly aggressive male who always seems to be in a bad mood. Perhaps he’s just guarding his territory. Or he doesn’t like the jogger’s choice of headgear. Whatever the reason, the last thing anyone expects is a dive-bombing owl with an attitude. I mean, come on! Who amongst us, city slickers that we are, thinks of owls as combative?! Most of what we know about owls comes from books and TV. For heaven’s sake, owls are WISE. They’re PATIENT. And they have a gentle sense of humor. Right? Evidently, this local owl never got the memo. Earlier or rural generations would, of course, know better. (I googled it, to be sure.) But we who’ve been raised on G-rated TV and movies think of the gentle, fatherly Owl from the animated Winnie-the-Pooh movies and TV shows. And the scholarly owl who challenged us to find out how many licks it takes to get to the center of a Tootsie Roll pop. Maybe even the silently spooky owl slowly rotating its head around 360 degrees on a ghostly Halloween night. Chances are that if any or all of these images came to mind when you read “owl,” well, then we’re probably more or less of the same generation. The phrase “the ties that bind” refers to a common idea or belief that links people together. For most of human history, that meant family or tribal traditions, religious communities, national or cultural identities, or social classes. Members of these groups share common experiences and a common outlook on life. Being part of these groups, speaking the lingo, breeds familiarity and comfort, and members can usually identify one another – even those we’ve never met - because of it. Shared generational experiences create these types of groups, too. We have quite a lot of generational experience to draw on. Factor in major national or world events, like World War II, the moon landing, 9/11, and Covid, to name a few. Living through one or more of these events with our peers shapes our viewpoint. Even when different generations experience a major event like the Great Recession together, how they perceive and react to it differs based on where they are in their lives. Our choices of entertainment alone give us many common reference points and touchstones. Popular TV shows for kids will have them using catch phrases from Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (“cowabunga!”) or sharing years later which Power Ranger they dressed up as for trick-or-treating. And then there’s video games and social media, which seem to change just about every day. And don’t forget about music! Music spans all media and changes frequently enough to give each and every generation something that’s uniquely theirs. We seem to gravitate most to the music we liked while we’re growing up and during our young adult years. I remember my grandparents playing their big band albums. My parents gravitated to Broadway show tunes. And I favor music from the mid 60s through the 80s. Well, most of it. Not disco – never liked it, even at the height of its popularity. (Sorry, disco lovers.) Perhaps more so for older generations than today’s Millennials and Gen Z’ers, TV shows and commercials provide strong ties that bind. Just like popular radio shows did for earlier generations. TV entertainment from the 60s and 70s – including commercials! – binds together my generation. Of course, with less choice than more recent generations, it was easier for us to have these cultural references. After all, we only had three channels to choose from, plus one for public television and (if we twisted the rabbit ears just the right way) another to tune in the toons on a Saturday morning. Almost everyone watched the same shows and talked about them at school the next day. I imagine it’s harder for today’s teens to all get on the same page, with hundreds of channels and TV shows competing for their attention. It’s certainly overwhelming for me! I have never heard of a quarter of these shows that play on cable stations I don’t even have paid access to watch. Millennials and Gen Z’ers manage to comb through them and find shows that they collectively claim as theirs. But do they provide the same strong common reference for their generations that we had? Maybe so, but I doubt they’re on the same order of what we remember. Hop aboard Mr. Peabody’s Wayback Machine with me and remember: We had wise old owls advising us to enjoy our Tootsie pops to the (not) bitter end. We sang those commercial jingles about Oscar Meyer baloney and McDonald’s hamburger ingredients – and some of us STILL know all the words by heart (guilty!). We knew that the Maidenform woman could show up anywhere in her lingerie and not be arrested for public indecency. We knew the Breck girl had fabulous hair, that Coke taught the world to sing, and that Choo-Choo Charlie could engineer the heck out of a train with his Good ‘n Plentys. And long before the worries of global cooling (70s), global warming (80s & 90s), and climate change (2000s), we knew exactly what the native American elder was saying about pollution. No words necessary; the single tear trickling down his cheek spoke volumes. It works in reverse, too. What binds one generation together totally befuddles another. I have usually no clue about the popular references my teen daughter and her friends like to use. And they want to keep it that way. (So I’ll play dumb about the things I DO get, just so they’ll let me listen in, thinking I’m totally in the dark. Heh heh.) And she rolls her eyes at cultural references from my generation that still give me a good laugh. I’m sure you know: kids can spot fakers a mile away. Especially those in entertainment trying to imitate they way they talk, act, or dress. Why? Because generational differences are usually at play. For example, my daughter and her friends mock the dialogue in a popular cable TV show about high schoolers. They can tell it was “written by a middle-aged woman” (it is) because “no real kids talk like that.” Perhaps an earlier generation of kids once did, but the word choice and cultural references are archaic according to today’s audience’s standards. And these kids, like every generation of kids before them, laugh or disdain (it varies on a daily basis) at older adults’ attempts to “look cool.” So, as a mom, I don’t even try to communicate in her lingo. If I did, I’d earn an eyeroll and an admonition that I’m only embarrassing myself. If I did it within earshot of her friends, then I’d be embarrassing to her. That makes sense. We had similar rules when we were her age, back when the dinosaurs roamed the earth and watched themselves hauling rock in “The Flintstones.” Fine with me. My contemporaries and I still enjoy our little coded phrases and kitschy commercial jingles, making fun of things that our kids would be hard-pressed to figure out. Every generation has its markers. The secret is to use them to find and make new friends. And share old memories.

Even the Energizer Bunny has a Breaking Point It’s summer and for the first time in nearly 18 months, we can honestly talk about traveling and taking vacations once again. Of course, for some of us, there may have been some unwanted “vacations” during the pandemic. My sympathies to those who were let go through no fault of their own. It’s painfully obvious driving around that all too many businesses – large and small, but mostly small – weren’t able to survive months of lost revenue. I sincerely hope that all those affected, including the business owners, have been able to pivot and find new opportunities going forward. For those who kept “their nose to the grindstone,” though, a mental health break is well overdue. It doesn’t matter whether your business just barely survived or enjoyed record profits, we’re all stressed from uncertainty, staffing concerns, and inventory shortfalls, to name just a few worries. Many of us assumed heavier workloads as companies tightened their belts and dealt with labor shortages and higher expenses. We’re tired. Our nerves are frayed. And we’re irritated at the long confinements we had to endure. Vacations are necessary, even if it’s just to get away for a few days now and then. Our mental and emotional health suffer without them. An honest-to-goodness relax and free-your-mind type of vacation usually needs about a week. It takes a few days to decompress from the stress of work and everyday life. How many times have you heard someone complain that, by the time they finally were able to unwind from work and relax, it was time to wrap up their trip and head back to their regular routine? Yup, me too. And there’s truth to it, especially if (like me) you’re prone to making lists, reviewing your to-do schedules in your head, and planning out your calendar weeks in advance. Sometimes a mental health break can be as little as a long weekend or – when there’s no option for some time off – a quick change of scenery during the work day. I like to stretch my legs and focus on something more than just my computer screen. The neighborhood park is not far from our home and just a ten minute walk around its circular design is enough to clear my mind. I especially enjoy seeing the little kids on the playground or riding their bikes as I stride along (jumping last minute out of their way plenty of times!). Just being outside in nature is often enough to rejuvenate me. My body is moving, my eyes can work the long distance vision again, and the sounds and smells of the outdoors are refreshing. Assuming that the neighbors have scooped up after their dogs. Taking a quick break for every few hours of work has its benefits, so here are a few good excuses - er, reasons - for taking a little time out: You’ll feel more relaxed. Your stress level goes down. Your mood improves. Your productivity improves. Your creativity is sparked. You’ll generally feel happier. Chances are people will pick up on your improved mood and be happier around you. You can think more clearly. With new stimuli, fresh ideas for solving stagnant problems often pop into your head. You’re more receptive to different perspectives. You have time for reflection. You’ll have had at least a little time just to yourself, without outside demands. One last benefit: It keeps you from going bonkers. Or developing tunnel-vision. If nothing else, the quick break reminds us that we’re human and not machines. We need time to refresh. Come to think of it, even machines break down if they’re not allowed to cool off from time to time. Human or machine, we all need to hit the off switch from time to time. Even writing this blog post has been a bit of a break, too. Just doing something different and using a different part of my brain is a nice change of pace. Ahhh…. OK, break’s over! Back into the closet for me (also known as my home voiceover studio). At least for a little while. 😊

Assess. Pivot. Proceed. And Have Fun. As an actor, you always have to be prepared to throw away … well, your preparation. And just go with the flow. I love it! While I’m a very organized person with to-do lists out the wazoo, I’ve always enjoyed a degree of spontaneity. I like the idea of something new popping into my world to stir up the old routine. Even back in my days in the business world, I looked forward to unforeseen challenges. And I had the right job for it. As a sales exec, you could be sure to always expect the unexpected. Clients, prospects, and leads – not to mention the brass in my company – could throw a “must have,” “need now,” or “extremely urgent” request on my desk and I had to stop whatever I was doing and resolve it. Especially if there was a problem involved. You learned very quickly that if you didn’t adapt to these changing situations and take charge of them, you were going to have a tough time succeeding in the job. But I thrived in that environment; I was certainly never bored. A lot of people don’t like that uncertainty in their work or their lives. I understand that – there’s much to be said for routine and the satisfaction of getting things done according to schedule. I like that, too … as long as the routine doesn’t segue into monotony. But I find it rather exciting not quite knowing what each day will bring. What’s in my morning email? Perhaps a new audition? Or – dare I hope – a booking? Anything can happen and it often does, including having a well-planned day’s schedule being unceremoniously booted into the next week. Life as an actor is a study in uncertainty. Unless you’re at or near the upper echelons of the business, you have to be quite flexible and responsive to the demands of those in charge. The decisions of casting directors, directors, and producers dictate what you can work on and in what capacity, as well as when and where. So how do you learn to handle things when your plans are suddenly upended? When a monkey wrench is thrown into the work you’ve done up to that point, forcing you to throw out hours of preparation in exchange for a few minutes of reworking your approach? I see it as a three step process: Assess Pivot Proceed It’s up to you to take in the changes, figure out how to go in a new direction, and then quickly move forward. Fortunately, this process can be learned and practiced in a very fun way. Did you know that there’s a whole genre within the acting world devoted to responding quickly to change? It’s called improvisation , or improv for short, and it’s an invaluable skill for any actor to acquire. You don’t need to be part of an improv troupe to participate (though you’ll have a great time if you do!). You just have to be ready to handle sudden changes that are thrown at you from any direction. Sounds scary, but it’s sort of like the game of hot potato you played as a kid. You learn to think on your feet and react quickly as you catch, receive, and throw ideas and actions off to someone else as soon as you receive them. Reaction is everything and it’s often hilarious. Honestly, an improv class is something that each of us could benefit from, whether or not we’re performers. I’ve never met anyone whose entire life has gone according to plan without some kind of unexpected interruption. It helps to have another tool in your set of handy experiences that teaches you how to handle unexpected events. Here’s an example of how improv training helped me recently. I was on the set of a music video the other day. The script was sent well in advance and I saw that my character began and ended the action in the video and had the only scripted lines. Sweet! As with any other acting job, I dived into the script to get a better idea of the storyline and my role within it. I took what the writer had created and constructed an entire background for my character, fleshing out her life story and imagining how she’d react to those around her. And, of course, I learned my lines well. Once on set, however, I was told not to worry about my lines. They were to be only a guidepost and that I should just feel free to improvise as needed. Rather than panicking, I thought: terrific! I was just offered creative freedom and the ability to take my character down any number of possible roads. Depending on what the other characters in the scene did, my reactions would be natural responses to whatever was going to happen and the words would just flow. I knew the essentials of what my character had to say, but I wasn’t constrained by a strict recitation of planned words. That freedom added to the “realness” of the story and let my character be the grounding force in the midst of all the zaniness surrounding the other characters. I was told that the ending had changed, too. Fine! I was happy to chuck the scripted version and play along with the director’s vision of how the new scene would play out. As it turned out, the result was much funnier than originally written. Line and scene changes are not at all uncommon on many sets, and actors are expected to incorporate them pretty quickly with minimal preparation. Improv training helps one easily let go of one direction and embrace another. My actions and lines in that last scene ended up being totally improvised with just minimal suggestions from the director. Then, to add a little more spice to the finished product, I had a little impromptu ADR session directly afterwards. We recorded a bunch of improvised phrases and laughs that came right off the top of my head as I replayed that final scene in my mind. Later, post-production would choose which of those they wanted to insert into the final video. I’ve always enjoyed thinking on my feet, but those improv classes I’d had over the years really taught me that there’s no “right” way to do things. Either something works or it doesn’t. And what does work is a very subjective decision that we can’t always predict, so it’s best to just “throw it out there.” Just listen to what the other people are saying and doing and react honestly in turn. You don’t need to be funny, just authentically “real.” This doesn’t mean you don’t need to fully prepare for a role! Most jobs will expect you to follow the script with perhaps only a few adjustments. Even when you’re being encouraged to improvise, you have to know what’s going on in the story and your character’s purpose as part of it. You still need to do your basic script analysis: the who, what, when, where, and why of any scene. Once on set, though, the actor has to be prepared to throw off all thought of their preliminary work and just meld into their character’s essence. Improv does all that for you. It trains you to free yourself from rigid preparation and to instead focus on the other people in the scene. Yes, the words and motivations are all there, we know what our character wants, but we’re not mentally inhibited by our preparation. The audience doesn’t want to see actors who seem to be disconnected from what’s going on in the scene. They want to believe that what’s taking place on the screen or stage is real and get lost in the story being told. Unless it’s Shakespeare, they probably won’t know or care if a line here and there is different from what’s written. Audiences want to see emotional and physical responses, because those are what trigger visceral reactions to the story in ourselves. Some of the best, award-winning scenes come from “mistakes” or improvised lines and reactions. When scene partners throw you a curve ball, which cause you to react in an unexpected or unrehearsed way, magic can happen. Sometimes it’s an improvement on the original material; that’s why comedians are popular choices if their acting is up to snuff. Remember Robin Williams? Pure genius! He improvised most of his lines in the animated version of “Aladdin.” The producers knew he was comic gold and that anything he said was going to be funnier than just about anything the writers could dream up. They were right. The animators were quite busy just keeping up with his flow of consciousness. His performance as the genie felt real. Authentic. And, of course, hilarious and immensely entertaining. So go ahead and sign up for an improv class. It may seem scary, especially if you’re not an actor or someone who can think on their feet. But it’s terrific training in learning how to deal with the unexpected in life, and often with a dose of good-natured humor. And that’s something we can all benefit from. And guess what? You’ll feel like a little kid again. You’re given permission to just be you and simply react to what’s going on around you. No right or wrong responses. Nothing is dumb. There will be plenty of funny moments, enjoyed by everyone in a nice non-judgmental way. (Isn’t that great for a change?!) And you’ll probably make some new friends. Besides, it’s really fun.

OMG and Other Useful Panic Phrases “OMG!” “Oy vey!” “Good grief!” “For heaven’s sake!” Whatever your exclamation of choice, it all means the same thing: sh*t happened. And it probably happened to you. Yup, that’s me. I’m in the middle of it. My voiceover studio is at risk of collapsing into the basement below it. Not an entertaining proposition, to say the least. I’m working with a temporary studio, but it’s not the same. Definitely need to get the problem solved! So how did this happen? Long story short: We had a small water issue in our basement – which in hindsight we should have just decided to live with, mopping up as we go. But no, my husband Alex and I decided to be proactive and get ahead of a problem which could likely get much worse over time. Being responsible homeowners, we called in a home foundations repair/waterproofing company with a good reputation. Not an inexpensive undertaking, but one that we thought necessary according to all the people we talked to. Hmmm. Can you say “disaster in the making?” It was one thing after another. First, they showed up one weekday morning without warning. We knew that we’d be scheduled for work sometime over the next few weeks, but we never received a formal call to establish the date. No problem. It’s Covid, we’re all working from home, and we were just glad it was finally our turn. It was an all-day job, making such a loud racket that it seemed the house was being shaken to its foundations. In a way it was, since they had to drill into concrete to install a new French drain and pump to replace the existing system. I went to check on the work midway through and just stopped in my tracks when I saw the absolute mess: heavy concrete dust flying around everywhere without proper venting. It was visible in the air and so hard to breathe. The debris covered everything and the work crew had made no effort to restrict the mess with plastic sheeting around their work area. Nor did they tell us what to expect so that we could move some nice furniture and equipment out of range. They didn’t even bother covering any of our belongings with tarps, plastic, or anything else that could have protected them. Worse, because they neglected to vent, thick dirt and dust covered every square inch of that basement. The debris was blown under the doors into others areas of that floor, coating everything in sight. Electronic equipment was ruined. By the time I saw what was happening, it was far too late to do anything. But that was nothing compared to what we learned two months later. First, a series of heavy rainstorms proved that the work was all for nothing. Same amount of water, in the same place. The company couldn’t tell where the problem originated and blamed it on issues outside of their contract. We’re brought in other experts who couldn’t tell either and said that we should just “live with it.” Second, through this process, we discovered the biggest problem of all: the work crew had removed and disposed of the weight-bearing struts that supported the floor above that part of the basement. They needed to do so to put in the water vapor barrier, but they did not replace them afterwards. The wooden poles they erected were left as is, a temporary “solution” and, as it turned out, totally useless. It took an architect to tell us that they were put in the wrong places, that the floor above was already sagging, and that we needed those weight-bearing structures replaced or good section of the floor above that area could come crashing down. There’s nothing like hearing that work, which perhaps should never have been done, served only to make a section of your home unstable, such that it could collapse without warning. The architect said to stay away from that unsupported part of the upper floor until new supports are in place (whenever that may be). Guess what’s up there on that floor? My voice over studio. Those G-rated exclamations don’t begin to cover my true feelings on the situation. This is not an easy problem to live with. Running around yelling, while temporarily therapeutic, doesn’t do my studio any good. Figuring out a temporary studio and fixing the underlying problem does. So, we’re divvying up the challenges. I pulled out my trusty, handy-dandy travel booth and equipment and went off to find as quiet a space in the house as I can to work. My husband began calling contractors to make the repairs. We’re both running into issues. Me, with finding peace and quiet in a house filled with busy people. Him, with trying to find good, qualified people to do the work. And show up. (That’s a whole other story….) “Keep calm and carry on” is our motto for the time being. Not that we’re all that calm about our situation, but we’re trying to mask it as best as possible, at least for the kids’ sake. I don’t think we’re fooling anybody, but really, what else are we going to do? Clear heads are betting at resolving problems than emotional basket cases. Assuming materials are available, we’re working to get everything fixed within a month. And that it would be done right this time. To ensure that outcome, we’re asking our architect friend to look in on the repairs as they are being made. Barring that, I’m also going to look for a building inspector who can step in and supervise the work. No more screw-ups! (Ah, that should be the motto of our foundation repair/waterproofing company….) We’ve had enough already. The worst case scenario is that we’ll need to file a lawsuit against the company. It’s a last resort, if all else fails. We’re not lawyers, so unlike them, we don’t realize “better living through litigation.” It’s a last measure and I certainly hope it doesn’t have to come to that! Stay tuned; this continuing saga will, I’m sure, be addressed in future blogs.

Creative Solutions for Survival How do you respond to a crisis? Are you paralyzed, not knowing what to do? Do you run for sanctuary elsewhere? Or do you stay put, handling the situation as best you can, finding other ways to be successful? Fifteen months into the pandemic, we look around us and see the responses to this crisis. Shuttered businesses. Atypically high prices on materials that overnight seem to suddenly be in much demand. (Have you heard about the price of lumber lately? And how long it takes now for delivery of all sorts of manufactured goods?!) Yes, some businesses are working feverishly to gear back up to full production and alleviate shortages. But so many others have gone into bankruptcy and … disappeared. Why? In many cases, the long-term economic shutdown became too much for their already razor-thin profit margins to withstand. Restaurants and small businesses especially took it hardest, though larger corporations carrying a lot of debt also had to fold. Some businesses simply did not have enough capital or manpower to adapt and survive. And a number of businesses just couldn’t – or wouldn’t – adjust to new ways of enabling employees to work from home or delivering their goods and services directly to their customers. The top business schools teach through the use of case studies, examining real-world scenarios and evaluating corporate decisions and their consequent successes or failures. It’s been fascinating to see this in action in our own neighborhoods. We’ve seen innovation and adaptation in play, with new services being offered to accommodate social distancing requirements. Restaurants seemed to lead the way with new “meals to go” and pickup windows; healthcare and business professionals embraced telemedicine and Zoom meetings, respectively; and entertainment giants have funneled movies – some originally intended for theatrical release and some, well, just original creations – through streaming services to audiences to enjoy at home. Schools took up virtual learning – for better or worse – and even many gyms and fitness centers offered classes online. Suddenly, our computers were our lifeline to the outside world. Talk about a whole lot of new case studies! As in earlier times, we’re seeimg that the most successful individuals and businesses are the ones who’ve been willing to risk new approaches to adapt to the changed environment. Some of the adaptations are actually quite innovative, speeding technological developments that may have required another 5-10 years to take hold. Remote conferencing is a great example. We’ve had the technology for a while, but people were reluctant to fully embrace it. Until they had no choice. Zoom has led the charge and companies have realized that it’s a great way to save time and money previously spent on travel. It’s also allowed individuals like me to attend a number of virtual conferences around the world from the comfort (and convenience!) of home. I’ve noticed that remote conferencing has especially enabled people with limited mobility, particularly those who are bed-ridden, to reclaim their ability to participate in meaningful ways. I think, too, that we’d all agree that digital distribution of movies is not likely to go away either, putting continuing pressure on movie theaters to remain economically viable. In my own line of work, I saw that voice actors as a group have done pretty well throughout the pandemic. Yes, there were far fewer projects in the first months as businesses pretty much ceased operations, but as spring turned into summer, voice over work proved resilient. The industry transitioned to home production fairly quickly with only a few adjustments. Clients and production houses found that they could create content from their home offices, collaborating online and working virtually with talent and other industry pros. The voice actors found themselves scrambling to build home studios, if they didn’t already have them. Those of us outside of the Los Angeles and New York markets had an advantage here; many of us already had broadcast-quality home studios in place. The LA and NY talent, however, were used to traveling to nearby studios for recording sessions, the result of a concentrated market and facilities in those cities. The biggest change the rest of us saw was the demand for connectivity software from our home studios. Many clients chose to use Source Connect, which very quickly became the new industry standard (supplanting the more cumbersome and expensive ISDN lines). Needless to say, Source-Elements, the creator of Source Connect, had a very profitable 2020. In my work as an on-camera actor, the biggest adaptation has been within the auditioning process. Pretty much gone (for now) are the in-person auditions in front of casting directors. Self-taping, in which the actor records the audition scene(s) and then digitally submits it to the casting director for review, is now the default auditioning process around the country. Its sudden rise in use was not a shocker to those of us in the Southeast; we’ve been self-taping for years before Covid hit. It was actually born from an earlier crisis, the Great Recession of 2007-2009, when it became economically infeasible for actors to drive long distances for short (often under 5 minutes) auditions. But in concentrated markets like LA and NY, the self-tape was rarely used. As with their voiceover counterparts, these film/TV actors had to very quickly learn how to create and properly use a home-based setup. Self-taping has its advantages and its drawbacks. It enables casting directors (CD) to see many more actors per role, viewing tapes at their personal convenience. It saves the CDs time, particularly when the digital playback can be stopped and quickly eliminated from consideration if the performance is too far off the mark. It gives actors ample opportunity to record multiple takes, choosing the one or two best, and presenting those to the CD. It also allows actors to audition from a physical distance, whether they’re away on set or out of town on vacation. Self-taping has its drawbacks, too, including the loss of personal interaction between CD and actor, the ability to be redirected with clearer instructions during the audition, networking and relationship building, etc. It can also make actors too dependent on the process, losing their comfort with in-person auditioning, trading technical perfection of a performance over authenticity, and becoming less able to “play“ with the script in front of a live audience. For the duration, though, as well as the foreseeable future, self-taping is here to stay. We will go back to in-person auditioning, but the self-tape has too many conveniences not to be used. So we might as well figure out how to create a good one. The essentials are a simple backdrop, (box) lights, a camera on a tripod, an external mic, and software for easy editing. Also important, though, is a good reader, ideally someone who is also an actor and understands how to be a good reader. So, what does a reader do? As the name suggests, it’s someone who reads all the other characters’ lines in the audition script. A good reader doesn’t just read the lines; they give the auditioning actor someone to play off, to react to, to influence, etc. during the scene(s). The reader needs to be loud enough to be heard on the audition tape, but not so loud as to take away from the auditioning actor. Another actor is ideal, but sometimes you have to improvise. In a pinch, I’ve drafted my son or husband, but neither has much patience for the role, nor do either of them have the training or interest to play the subdued but important role of an off-screen scene partner. My teen daughter, who is also an actress, is a terrific option, but she’s often not available. And sometimes the material is not appropriate to play against a teenager. Especially yours. This is where Zoom and an actor buddy come in handy. I’ve worked with a number of other actors and traded services as a reader. While I very much appreciate having someone read with me in my auditions, I’ve found that I learn so much more when I’m reading for another person. And I gain more than I give in the following ways: 1. Learning what truly makes a good read (or not) It’s a little like sitting on the casting director’s shoulder. If you’re like me, we have in mind how the scene in front of us would play out. We have a notion of how we’d play a particular role, the choices we’d make, those character traits we’d bring to the part. And then we get to see how our friend interprets it differently. The nuances and tactics – sometimes even the main objective – can be wholly different than you’d ever considered. Personally, I love that! It goes to show how each of us brings something unique to each role we play. Conversely, reading for another actor can also show us what NOT to do. Did our friend fall into a trap within the script, taking the expected (and dull) route? Was our friend (gasp) not properly prepared to tape? There's nothing worse than to be grasping for lines, becoming more and more flustered with every attempt. (Best to reset and try another time.) Did our friend overact, showing the need for more training? We don’t want to tell the other actor what to do, but sometimes it can be painful to watch. 2. Seeing risks that work (or not) Following on the first point, it’s instructive to see the risks that another actor takes to make a character work. Whether it’s creating a memorable first moment before a word is ever uttered or taking a character in a unique direction, it’s fascinating to see how actors can truly make scripts their own. Say the actor chooses a sassy, smart-mouth attitude for a character that on the surface seems to be the embodiment of sweetness and light. It could become an interesting new twist that the writer and director never intended, but may like enough to adopt. And like enough to cast the actor for revealing that unexpected interpretation. Alternatively, the risk could be so far off base that it leaves the casting director a bit baffled. On one hand, it could give the actor points for originality and consideration for another, future project. Or … it could leave the casting director with the impression that the actor would benefit from more training before taking a chance on them. That’s why it’s called a risk. But if an actor doesn’t take them now and then, the actor risks being labeled as mediocre, bland, as someone taking the easy, safe route, etc. Not such a good thing in the end. 3. Observing how a little creativity can enhance a mediocre script Sometimes … the material isn’t so great. Perhaps the writers are just starting out or are exploring a new genre within the entertainment industry. Whatever the background, it doesn’t matter. It’s up to the actor to elevate the script to something more interesting, nuanced, authentic … something far more than what’s on the page. That something can be creating a character background and history that informs the story in subtle ways, providing new meaning to the dialogue, with a depth to the character that hadn’t previously been written. When an actor can do this, it’s startling to see how much can be gleaned from a scene that, on the surface, had seemed so vanilla. It reminds me of an acting exercise that provides two actors with short, very vague dialogue. The dialogue itself doesn’t really tell us much. It’s up to the actors to give it direction and purpose. The whole point of the exercise is to have the actors dig deep within themselves to flesh out entire characters that will never be truly revealed, but that are very much evident in the way they converse and interact with each other, using just the basic, non-descript dialogue. It’s amazing to see what each person comes up with! 4. Generating goodwill, that warm tingly feeling when you help someone else There is something within us that just makes us feel good when we can help someone out. I find it very gratifying to know that I’ve helped one friend make his deadline or another friend her workload as she balances two jobs and family commitments. And their heartfelt appreciation is genuine, which is rewarding unto itself and makes me want to be available the next time they need me. 5. Friendship! I’ve developed good friends in this manner. I’ve met them on set, in class, and through other people in the industry, but the relationship builds through our mutual assistance. Atlanta is known for the warm, supportive attitude within its acting community. Helping one another as readers for our self-tapes is just one more way that we’re there for each other, not just in the auditioning process, but as human beings. The pandemic may have sidelined the entertainment industry for a while and kept us physically distanced, but through technology it’s also brought us closer together in spirit. It’s given us a third option to the old fight or flight choice when faced with a crisis: Adapt. Create. Yup … turn lemons into lemonade.

Responsibilities of Both Customer and Service Provider My home is an extension of myself. It reflects who I am (OK, my husband and kids, too, but let’s be honest, who REALLY does the work of taking care of it?!). It’s a comfortable and welcoming place, nicely appointed but livable. And like the rest of me, I keep it in order. My home is clean, neat, and well maintained. So when something is damaged or in serious disarray, it’s personally upsetting and I want to remedy the situation as soon as possible. I’m not talking about the little things, like kids messing up the house or someone dropping and breaking a piece of glass. I’m referring to more serious problems, like a termite infestation, a tree dropping on the roof, or water leaking and flooding the basement. These issues take time and expertise to resolve and, yes, more than just a little money. We want to find the right experts at an affordable price, bring them in as soon as possible, and see the job done right the first time. Ideally, this is how it would always play out. In the real world, sometimes – as I’ve recently experienced - it takes flexibility, patience, and more than a little determination to have a problem properly rectified. In a perfect situation, these expert providers would be on top of the customer’s problem, informing them of their availability and keeping them updated on their progress. In real life, though, most of these providers need to seriously improve their communications with their customers. Case in point: we recently had water seepage in our basement. Fortunately, we caught the problem early and called in a well-regarded company specializing in waterproofing and foundation repair. Unfortunately, as we discovered after the fact, their onsite crew manager was having a bad day personally and neglected to properly vent a lot of concrete dust and debris. He also didn’t bother to cover or protect our furniture and other possessions where the crew was working. As homeowners, we weren’t even alerted to the mess that could be made so we could have moved what we could to other areas of the home. And what a mess they made. A thick layer of concrete dust and debris covered everything throughout the entire area and even to other areas of the house. The crew made no effort to clean it up, either. Their attitude was that they had a job to do, they did it, and then they were moving on. We were not happy. It took ten days for a field manager to respond to our complaint and come to the house to see for himself the extent of the mess. Concrete dust was still floating in the air; it was still so thick that we all had to wear face masks in the area just to avoid coughing. (At least with Covid, we had plenty of masks on hand.) He said that it was the worst mess he’d ever seen on one of their jobs and apologized for the inconvenience. He asked for our patience while he consulted with his company about how to best clean it up. On that promise, we remained flexible and patient waiting for his response, dealing with the filthy and unbreathable area of our home as best we could. (This was not an unused basement.) Turns out we had to be patient for quite a while, because our emails and phone calls to the field manager and others in his company went unanswered. This was the point when flexibility and patience turned into determination to force the issue with the company. It seemed that nothing was going to be done unless we made it happen. We stopped payment on the deposit for the work, researched commercial-grade cleaning crews ourselves, and laid the groundwork for legal action. Money talks, and presumably it must have in this case, because we finally heard back from the company after we stopped payment on our deposit. They said the long silence was because it had taken some time to present our situation to upper management and find the right cleaning solution. Perhaps so, but more likely not, because we learned afterwards that the cleaning company they called in is their standard go-to solution for many years for cleaning up similar messes. Much good will and aggravation could have been saved if the waterproofing/foundation repair company had just been communicating with us over the month that we had been waiting for an answer. Just a call to say that they hadn’t forgotten about us, that they’re working on a solution, would have alleviated our concerns. Simple respect for the customer and the voiced desire to make things right would have salvaged our relationship. In any industry, with any product or service, things can go wrong. But it’s how the situation is handled by both sides of the customer/provider solution that makes all the difference. I’ve worked in the business world long enough and in a number of different capacities to know that a level head and honest communication are the best ways to go about resolving a problem. Each side has an implied responsibility to give the other the information and opportunity to bring about a favorable resolution: The customer can clearly and concisely state the complaint and give the product or service provider a chance to respond. Flexibility and patience are in order, as long as the provider is trying to correct the problem. The provider, in turn, can maintain a line of communication with the customer, assuring them that they have received the complaint, that it’s being addressed, and at what point they would be able to answer the complaint with a plan of action. It’s basic customer service, or at least it should be. Most of the time, the customer just wants to know that they are being heard, their concern respected, and that the provider will stand behind its product or service. In our case, the cleanup crew did an excellent job, both in the final result and in their manner of handling the situation from start to finish. They took our concerns seriously and only considered the job complete when we were satisfied that it was done well. Too bad the waterproofing/foundation repair company left us with a different impression. I’m so often in the role of the service provider (the voice actor) that it felt a bit odd to be the customer in this interaction. And I was so disappointed in the initial non-responsiveness of this company, which ran counter to their reputation. Could it be the size of the company that makes the difference? For the best companies that offer top-notch customer service, it shouldn’t be. Sadly, there seems to be less and less value placed on customer service and care for the individual with every passing year. That’s why I so appreciate those businesses that still value their customers and prove it when things go awry. My work ethic is similar to that of the cleaning company: I’m happy when my client is happy. I’ll go that extra mile to make sure that the job is done right. And I treat my customers as I would want to be treated myself, especially if something needs to be improved. It all comes down to my personal and professional reputation. After all, my business – like my home – is an extension of myself. If nothing else, this experience will remind me to always think of every transaction from the perspective of the customer. My particular story, however, is not quite over, though I truly wish it were. We just had a major rainstorm and – you guessed it – there’s water again in our basement, in the very same spot. Here we go again … (sigh). At least, I may have the pleasure of interacting with that excellent cleaning company again.

Looking Forward to Being Utterly Outrageous “Aging seems to be the only available way to live a long life.” - Author Kitty O’Neill Collins I have a birthday coming up. I’m long past the age where I’d count the days to celebrating with a party, presents, and cake … though I still look forward to the cake. Chocolate, please. Yes, I admit it. I still look forward to my birthday. For dinner out and away from the kitchen, if nothing else. “Birthdays are good for you. Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest.” - Author Larry Lorenzoni And they’re a marker of how I’ve spent my time on this planet. I can remember every year and how I, the world, and the people have changed with the times. My character is testament to how I’ve handled life. My face reflects how I’ve dealt with all the things that I’ve experienced. “Nature gives you the face you have at twenty; it is up to you to merit the face you have at fifty.” - Fashion designer Coco Chanel Attitude is our outlook on life. It’s how we’ve managed the ups and downs and whether we’ve been defeated by setbacks or made all that much stronger by them. It’s whether we see the glass as half full or as half empty. Whether we only see that gathering clouds or consider the rain and occasional silver linings they bring. And if we can see humor in everyday events. “You don’t stop laughing when you grow old, you grow old when you stop laughing.” - Playwright George Bernard Shaw So I have another birthday approaching. It’s not a big number. Definitely nothing to get my panties all in a wad over and bemoan the passing years. It’s just another tick mark on the wall of my counting, one that I don’t need to stress over. Because I’ve decided that age is a matter of attitude. OK, that’s easy for me to say right now, as I’m in top physical shape and feel as on top of my game as ever. I’m still a long way from geezerhood, but I know there’ll come a day when I’ll find myself creaking a bit and struggling to do what used to come effortlessly. And when I do, I’ve decided that I’m going to make the most of it. I want to be the little old lady from Pasadena, living life to the fullest. I want to be the most interesting character in the knitting circle (not that I knit … right now), the older neighbor that you actually enjoy talking to. In fact, I want to have fun and be my most authentic self. “Old age is an excellent time for outrage. My goal is to say or do at least one outrageous thing every week.” - Activist Maggie Kuhn Elder years give unsaid permission for behavior and attitudes that may not have been possible before. You can get away with saying things that you never would have been able to before. Have you noticed how some of the most beloved eccentrics in literature, film, and TV are the elderly? They often say the things most others are thinking, but would never dare voice. They wear whatever they darn well feel like, sleep whenever they want, and live life on their own terms. “At age 20, we worry about what others think of us. At age 40, we don’t care what they think of us. At age 60, we discover they haven’t been thinking of us at all.” - Advice columnist Ann Landers How funny to realize that most people are just so wrapped up in their own lives that they’re not constantly judging us after all! Ann Landers has it right: we are more comfortable with ourselves as we move into mid-life. Confidence replaces the hesitation and uncertainty of youth when we ‘re worrying about fitting in within our peer group. We come to terms – and peace - with our personal strengths and weaknesses and hopefully the decisions we’ve made up to that point. Later still, we relax even more into our own authentic selves, reclaiming our individuality more strongly than since we were children and taught to be self-conscious and self-disciplined. Saying what we really think may or may not get us into trouble. It may endear us to certain people and isolate us from others. A social filter is still a good thing to keep in place, knowing the fine line between what’s appropriate to share in public and what’s definitely not. Otherwise, while some people may find you quaint and amusing, others may rack it up to dementia. And you really don’t want to go there. “Aging is not ‘lost youth’ but a new stage of opportunity and strength.” - Activist Betty Friedan If life’s been good to you and you’ve been able to plan well and retire comfortably, your elder years can be the best of your life. It’s a time to travel and learn new things, explore interests and hobbies that you didn’t have time for earlier, or discover latent talents that you never knew you had. “Your 40s are good. Your 50s are great. Your 60s are fab. And 70 is f*@king awesome!” - Actress Helen Mirren Not only can you have fun on your own, but it’s a great time to spoil your grandkids (or nieces or nephews) like you never did with your own children. Yes, go ahead, sugar them up, wear them out, and then wave a cheerful good-bye as you leave them for their parents to deal with. Think of it as instant karma for all those times your own kids provided you with rather challenging moments. Ha! Serves them right.  “Aging is an extraordinary process where you become the person you always should have been.” - Singer-songwriter David Bowie It’s time to appreciate the little things in life again, like the sweetness of each season, long walks with special people and longtime friends, and the play of children. It’s time to slow down your pace and enjoy meeting new people. It’s an opportunity to volunteer your knowledge, skills, services, and wisdom for the benefit of others. It’s time to unfold your true essence and share yourself with those wise enough to appreciate the value of what’s being offered. “The afternoon knows what the morning never suspected.” - Poet Robert Frost If we’ve matured as we’ve aged, we have a lot to offer younger people, should they be open to receive it. Some retirees become active in their religious institutions, as students, lay leaders, or volunteers. There’s more of a focus on the spiritual and exploring the richness of spirit than on the demands of family and work. “My physical body may be less efficient and less beautiful in old age. But God has given me an enormous compensation: my mind is richer my Soul is broader and my wisdom is at a peak. I am so happy with the riches of my advanced peak age that, contrary to Faust, I would not wish to return to youth.” Author Robert Muller While physical aging isn’t something most of us look forward to, there’s plenty else in compensation. And as long as we’re not plagued with pain, illness, or disability, our elder years can do little to slow us down. “Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.” - Author Mark Twain A famous quote – perhaps the best known of all – is that: “ Age isn’t a number, it’s an attitude. “ Guess what? There is scientific evidence to support that very thing. Researchers from Yale and Miami University (my alma mater!) determined that people who saw growing older as something positive lived seven and a half years longer than those who didn’t. Becca Levy at the Yale School of Public Health showed that putting a more positive spin on our general view of aging can make a profound difference in the health of people over 65. Poet & playwright Robert Browning shared this positive attitude: “Grow old along with me! The best is yet to be.” Besides, what choice do you have?! “Old age isn’t so bad if you consider the alternative.” - Actor & singer Maurice Chevalier So here's to birthdays! Now, bring on that chocolate cake....

Paying Opportunity Forward Within my theatrical agency, I’m one of the go-to people for voice over. This has especially been the case this past year when pretty much everything else in the entertainment industry ground to a halt. Yes, VO took a bit of a hit in the spring of 2020, but over the summer it bounced back strongly, while on-camera productions continued to languish. Not surprisingly, many actors who were thrown out of work were very seriously looking into VO as a possible expansion to their careers. I like being a resource. During Covid, at the request of my agency, I gave a few webinars introducing actors to VO work and how to get started the right way: avoiding the traps that many new VO talent fall into, particularly the scamsters who are always out to take advantage of the uninformed. Many of the suggestions I gave eventually became a series of six articles in my blog under Resources. (They’re still there, if you’re curious about VO yourself.) And I’ve been regularly adding my two cents in the relevant Facebook groups when actors, both within and outside my agency, ask questions about the business. I’ve even worked directly with a few folks who were recording their VO auditions on their phones and needed help with their sound quality or proper formatting of their auditions. Most people do like to help others. There’s something intrinsically within us that rewards us with a bit of happiness when we do something nice for someone else. It can be as simple as answering a question or providing directions, to full-on mentoring of someone who’s coming behind you on the same career path. And most of us appreciate being helped. So useful to know how to apply our efforts most productively, to understand the steps others have taken to become successful! While these opportunities to help others pop up in our everyday lives, most of us think of mentoring in career terms. It doesn’t even have to be a well-defined, full-on mentorship program! It can be as simple as helping another person from one place (where they may be stuck) to the next through advice, introductions, or sharing of resources. I still fondly remember those who went out of their way for me when I was first getting started in my business career. Their little suggestions, tips, and even warnings saved me a lot of time and trouble. They may not have thought twice about them, but they meant the world to me when I needed them most. And I found it most gratifying when I could help someone else, in turn. Early in my corporate days, I was asked by our manager to guide a young woman just a year out of college to looking and acting more professional. Honestly, I was hesitant, because the request didn’t come from her and most women wouldn’t care for unsolicited advice from a co-worker. Fortunately, he must have suggested that she have a talk with me, because she eventually approached me and asked for ideas about a new hairstyle. From there, we discussed appropriate hair, makeup, clothing, and business etiquette – things I’d picked up over the years along the way. She adapted, the manager approved, and she was eventually awarded with a promotion. I felt good, knowing that in a small way I had helped her along her career path. More recently, I’ve been asked and given guidance to other women who, like me, decided to pursue an acting career later in life, usually after kids are grown or at least more independent, or in retirement. It’s been a great way to begin new friendships and it’s been so gratifying to see them make progress in their training and accomplishments. The same is true for voice over. Many of those conversations actually begin while I’m on set with another actor or a crew member. I love talking about VO and sharing the names, websites, and podcasts of more experienced and well-known talent who offer classes, coaching, and other resources. The appreciation from the other person reminds me of how much I valued the time that others took to do the same for me when I first began. It’s also a bit of paying forward the incredibly valuable coaching and career advice that some of my favorite teachers have given to me over the years. Sometimes, it’s the personal advice or heart-to-heart talks that can make all the difference in someone’s life. I love talking with younger women about the challenges that they face in the workplace, whether it’s in the entertainment industry or other workplace. I’m dismayed at hearing stories of sexual harassment or unwanted attention thrust upon them, especially in the business environment where I thought much more progress had been made since “my day.” At least there seems to be less criticism of women who are forthright and confident in their work. When I was in the trenches, it seemed that women were forever managing the balance between appearing assertive vs. aggressive. It’s the old joke: 51% sweetheart. 49% bitch. Don’t push it. Pay it forward is an expression for describing the beneficiary of a good deed repaying the kindness to others instead of to the original benefactor. - Wikipedia The idea of paying something forward has been around for a long time, but the phrase entered the popular lexicon from Catherine Ryan Hyde's 1999 novel Pay It Forward , which became a movie of the same name in the year 2000. The story is about an 11 year old boy who devises and puts into action a charitable plan of networking good deeds to change the world for the better. It's similar to the Jewish concept of "tikkun olam," which literally means to repair the world through good deeds or mitzvahs. And helping another person, such that you are both smiling and feeling positive about it, goes a long way to making the world a better place.